There are many times in life when you feel like you are treated badly, overlooked, shunned, ignored and just straight up insulted. Yet, as Ancient Toltec wisdom says, the external world only reflects back what you feel about yourself internally. If it’s throwing something at you that doesn’t feel like truth at all, then you’ll usually miss it. It will go over your head and not affect you.
The path to self improvement comes when you can take up the habit of setting aside your reactions and seeing these happenings around you to be reflections. Rather than reacting, taking offence or being hurt; you can say “Hey, check that out. That person said this to me and I felt low (sad, mad, injured, small, offended …) Therefore there is some element of truth I found in what they said. What was the element I considered to be truth that hurt the most in what they said?
If you look at it more objectively without getting swamped in the emotions, you can then pick out the words, or interpretation, which needs a bit of work to remove from your psyche. Once you’ve removed it, you will see similar words or actions happening less because there is no reason for the world to reflect it back at you anymore. You no longer have that belief about yourself, so the belief is no longer broadcast out to the world and you no longer get the same “ping back”.
When You Are Feeling Unworthy
Many of the things that hurt us stem from how worthy we feel. There are plenty of self development gurus and experts who will yell at you “You’re a God/Goddess, you’re a super star, you’re special! See it, believe it and your life will change.”
So we go “Oh, ok. I’m a Goddess. Whoo! Yeh! How exciting. No, not really.” We can say a million affirmations, put on a nice dress, push out our chest and strut about but it really just feels like we are kidding ourselves. Like playing fancy dress.
If you find this is the case, how about simply being as worthy as everyone else?
Exercise: Finding Self Worth
Pinpoint the thing you have stuck in your psyche and reason with yourself in a new way. Let’s look at an example.
One I see which is very common amongst my clients is whether or not they are worthy of love or admiration. How can we look at this differently? Try whichever affirmations are most useful to you or make you’re own ones up in a similar fashion.
There are others who are older than me and younger than me who are deeply loved. I am just as worthy as them.
There are others who are thinner or fatter than me who are deeply loved. I am just as worthy as them.
There are others who are poorer or richer than me who are deeply loved. I am just as worthy as them.
There are others who are brighter or dumber than me who are deeply loved. I am just as worthy as them.
There are others who are more talented or less talented than me who are deeply loved. I am just as worthy as them.
There are others who are more successful or less successful than me who are deeply loved. I am just as worthy as them.
There are others who are more extrovert or more shy than me who are deeply loved. I am just as worthy as them.
I am just as worthy as that person and that person and that person.
You see? You can pick whatever the main criticism is that you have of yourself and prove there is no evidence to suggest you are less worthy than anyone else.
As an exercise, just like the Beautiful exercise we’ve done before, popping this thought into your mind on a frequent basis, even for a week, can dramatically turn your mindset around. You don’t have to be a super star or a God/Goddess. Just accepting that you are as worthy as the next is enough to knock out the resistance. Then, you can start to attract a different, more positive sort of reflection from the world. You can be, do or have whatever you are reaching for.
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