I was reading this Huffington Post article today about those who have been waiting 11 years since the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks for trauma and health compensation.

My immediate reaction was, Lordy Lordy! Are these people still waiting?

And not in the same way most of the comments below the article were saying “shameful”, “alarming” and “disgraceful”.

I mean, fancy hanging your hat on this disaster – admittedly it was a good size hook – and blaming your lack of health, income and happiness on it for 11 years. That’s more than a decade of feeling bad and being a victim.

Come to think of it, so many people do this. They don’t even need a hook the size of the September 11 terrorist attacks.

For some it’s
– a husband who abandoned them,
– a sibling who dropped them on their tail bone when they were a child,
– the workmate who blamed them and got them fired from a job
– or even a verbal humiliation in front of someone they wanted to impress that would have made all the difference, giving them the break they needed which would have allowed them to live happily ever after.

These hooks are viral. Children watch adults blame all and sundry for their misfortunes and start to mimic the behaviour early on.

“You’ve ruined my day!” I heard a little girl of about 5 years old say once.

Gee – it’s only 10.30am in the morning, sweetie. Don’t you think you have enough time today to get happy again?

Coming back to 9/11 though. I understand the need for memorial events and days. People want to remember those “fallen”. Though, quite frankly, I’ve had enough personal experience and learnt enough through channellers to know that those who pass away are doing just fine.

They may have already dived back in and started a new life almost immediately if they still have lessons to learn or a balance to be created.

The Memorials are more for the friends and family who were left behind. For their grief, sorrow, yearning to touch that soul again. Is this something we want to drag ourselves through every year, though?

If we can draw the emphasis away from loss, sadness, victimhood and focus more on “what did we learn from this event about ourselves?” then we would move forward a lot more quickly.

I’m sure each of us would have learnt something about ourselves from 9/11.

For me sitting on the other side of the world, I rapidly grew my appreciation for my family and community. If I can’t predict when a terrorist will strike, then it’s important for me to live the best life I can and enjoy it as much of it as possible.

There is no time to be doing what other people want me to do or expect of me.
That I “should” be doing a job because I’m good at it even if it doesn’t turn me on.
That I “should” listen to this Ee-Aw whinging friend on the phone every day because it’s the polite and caring thing to do.
That I “should” keep up appearances on anything that is socially acceptable but does not match who I truly am.

And let’s face it. You don’t need a terrorist to finish this life. You could be run over by a bus, bitten by a spider … there are plenty of ways to go without being too dramatic.

So spending any amount of time talking yourself into worse health, income or relationship issues because you have some one or some thing to hook the blame on is only harming you.

I have a favourite saying here…

Your eyes are in the front of your head. Look forward!

Simply look at where you stand right now and start creating where you’d like to be.

There’s so many possibilities you can have, or do or be, none of which you can see when you’re looking behind you.

And don’t grieve so much for those who have passed on. They’re closer to you now that they ever could be in physical form. They can only reach you when you’re happy.